Killing Calm: Salvatore Brotherhood MC Book One Read online

  Haley Tyler

  Killing Calm

  Salvatore Brotherhood Book One

  Copyright © 2021 by Haley Tyler

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise without written permission from the publisher. It is illegal to copy this book, post it to a website, or distribute it by any other means without permission.

  This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author's imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.

  Cover Design: Haley Tyler, Photographer: Andrew Poplavsky

  First edition

  This book was professionally typeset on Reedsy

  Find out more at reedsy.com

  To my Harley-riding, tattoo-having, Crazy Town singing, beach-loving Auntie.

  Our world isn’t the same without you and we miss you every day. I love you forever and for always.

  Rest easy, Aunt Liza.

  1/9/65-8/9/21

  “If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. If they don’t, they never were.”

  — Kahlil Gibran

  Contents

  Playlist

  Trigger Warning

  Prologue

  Addie

  Addie

  Bash

  Addie

  Bash

  Addie

  Addie

  Bash

  Addie

  Bash

  Bash

  Addie

  Bash

  Addie

  Addie

  Bash

  Addie

  Bash

  Addie

  Bash

  Addie

  Addie

  Addie

  Addie

  Bash

  Bash

  Addie

  Addie

  Bash

  Epilogue

  Playlist

  Official Killing Calm Playlist

  Perfect - Across the Atlantic

  One More I Love You - Alex Warren

  Some Kind of Disaster - All Time Low

  Drag the Lake - The Amity Affliction

  Human - Anavae

  Close to Me - Archers

  Making Eyes - Archers

  Too Good at Goodbyes - Archetypes Collide

  Burning Out (Unplugged) - Bad Omens

  Disease - Beartooth

  Afterall - Beartooth

  Believe - Beartooth

  1x1 (feat. Nova Twins) - Bring Me The Horizon

  Chasing Ghosts - Calling All Captains

  Something Just Like That - The Chainsmokers, Coldplay

  Have Faith In Me - A Day To Remember

  Mindreader - A Day To Remember

  Resentment - A Day To Remember

  Everything We Need - A Day To Remember

  Just Like Me - Dragged Under

  XO Tour Llif3 - Driveways

  Sunrise - Fallbrook

  Her Eyes - Fame on Fire

  Down - Fame on Fire

  Other Half of You - FigureItOut

  Sleep Without You - FigureItOut

  Without Me - FigureItOut

  Drown - Front Porch Step

  Just Say It - Goalkeeper

  Forever Yours - Grayscale

  Afterlife - Holding Absence

  Die Alone (In Your Lovers Arms) - Holding Absence

  Can’t Help Falling In Love - Ice Nine Kills

  SAVAGES - Ice Nine Kills

  Serotonin - In Her Own Words

  My Heart I Surrender - I Prevail

  Every Time You Leave - I Prevail

  Let Me Be Sad - I Prevail

  Pray - jxdn

  I Wish Things Were Different - Like Ghosts

  One Step Closer - Linkin Park

  I Think I’m OKAY (with YUNGBLUG & Travis Barker) - Machine Gun Kelly

  Piece Of Your Heart - Mayday Parade

  Wait. - Painting Promises

  Holding Me Down - Picturesque

  Gasoline - Point North

  If I Had an Airplane - SayWeCanFly, Emily James

  Here’s My Heart - SayWeCanFly

  Better Off - Secret Eyes

  Six Feet Under - Silent Theory

  Reaper - Silverberg, Jordan Frye

  Bad Habits - Silverstein, Intervals

  Burn It Down - Silverstein, Caleb Shomo

  Anchor (Reimagined) - Skillet

  The Last Night - Skillet

  Stay ‘Til the Daylight - Skillet

  Like I Do - Slaves

  How It Feels to be Lost - Sleeping With Sirens

  Freaks Like Us - Sleeping Wolf

  Hard to Love - Stateside

  Venomous (feat. Spencer Charnas) - Sullivan King

  Blood on Your Knees - Suzanne Santo

  No More Bad Days - This Wild Life

  Riot - Vo Williams

  Stuckinmybrain - VRSTY

  Gravity - Wage War

  Carry the Weight - We Came As Romans

  NO WAY OUT - The Word Alive

  Let It Burn - Written by Wolves

  Adrenaline (feat. Ice Nine Kills) - Zero 9:36

  Trigger Warning

  This book contains material some readers might find triggering such as:

  Sexual assault, drug/alcohol abuse, talk of addiction, domestic violence, explicit sexual content, swearing, and graphic violence.

  Prologue

  Addie

  1 Year Ago

  “Vanilla latte, extra foam!” I say, my voice carrying over the chatter in the small cafe. I turn my back to the pick-up counter and quickly move to clean the coffee maker.

  “Ad,” an all too familiar voice rumbles. I stiffen and glance up, my back still to him, and feel my face drain of color. “Can we talk, please?”

  My feet begin moving on their own accord, making my choice for me. I turn around and meet his hazel eyes. “Yes,” I breathe and take my dark apron off robotically. Throwing it on the counter, I tell Kenny, my manager, I’m going on break. She nods and narrows her eyes warily at the big, scary-looking biker.

  “You need help, kid?” She asks quietly as she steps in front of me, making me halt before I can round the counter.

  “I’m okay, Kens. He’s an old friend,” I say and give her what’s probably an unconvincing smile. I’ll have to explain him later, but right now I need to find out why Sebastian Salvatore is at my job.

  I follow him as he leads us outside and to the alley beside the cafe. His broad shoulders are tense as he walks, his booted feet making loud thuds on the pavement. Brick walls stand on either side of us, the ground mostly clear of trash and debris. Leaning against his bike, he extends the coffee out to me. I tilt my head to the side and eye the cup, then him.

  “I remember this being your favorite,” he says shyly. Then he shrugs like it’s not a big deal he remembers my coffee order from six years ago. I nod and bite my lip as I take the cup from him.

  “Yeah, thanks,” I say and take a small sip. “What are you doing here, Bash?” I’m proud that my voice comes out firm and not shaky. With a false sense of confidence, I lean casually against the brick wall and take another sip. “I haven’t seen you in… What? Six years?” He scrubs his hand roughly over his face and lets out a long breath before narrowing his eyes at me.

  He’s bigger than he was six years ago and his hair is longer. His dark beard is a little longer too, but still neatly shaped. Dark wavy hair that’s long on top but shaved on the sides sits on his perfe
ct head and is pushed lazily away from his face. Those hazel eyes are as mysterious and familiar as ever, though.

  He has on a pair of dark jeans with some authentic rips in them, black motorcycle boots, and a faded, well-loved black band tee that’s way too fucking tight on him. It shows off every hill and valley of his muscles that makes even the strongest of women weak. His leather jacket, his cut, hangs on his chest and a pair of dark shades sit on his head.

  Overall, he’s still hot as hell.

  I scan him, wanting to burn him into my memory when I notice the word President sewn onto the front of his cut.

  My heart fucking stops.

  Sebastian Salvatore is President of The Brotherhood.

  “That’s not true,” he protests. I roll my eyes and shift my weight to one leg, trying to ignore the mocking patch, but my eyes keep going back to it.

  “Semantics.”

  “We saw each other a few months ago, Ad,” he sighs, but the irritation is clear in his voice.

  I close my eyes against the memory.

  * * *

  “Bash? Hey, it’s Adelaide. Addie?” I say into the phone, my voice and hands shaky. “I’m sorry to call you so late—”

  “It’s not a problem, what’s up?” He says in that gruff, tight voice of his. These are the first words I’ve heard from him in six years and my stomach somersaults. I wince at his tone but tell myself that it’s just the way his voice sounds—he’s not angry. If he didn’t want to talk to me, he wouldn’t have answered.

  “I need your help,” the words hang in the silence between us for so long I worry our call dropped. But then he clears his throat.

  “What is it? Where are you?”

  Thirty minutes later, Bash pulls up on his bike. The rumble of it echoes around the empty dirt road until he shuts it off.

  The silence is deafening.

  I try to smile at him but he either can’t see it in the darkness, or he doesn’t want to acknowledge it. I worried this meeting was going to be awkward and uncomfortable, but surprisingly, it’s not, regardless of his not-so-warm greeting. Seeing him feels right. I want to throw myself in his arms and sob while he holds me. While he shushes and rocks me like he’s done before.

  I want him to make me feel safe.

  “He in there?” He jerks his chin to the black G-Wagon. I nod and bite my lip as I watch him round the car. When he stops in front of me, I look away from his heavy gaze and sigh.

  “Look, I’m really sorry. I haven’t seen you in years, then call you out of nowhere in the middle of the night needing your help,” I shake my head, annoyed with myself. “I’m sorry, Bash. I just didn’t know what to do or who to call. You were the only person in my head, the only one I knew I could trust. I just—I didn’t know what to do.”

  He gives me a sharp nod but no reassurances before he turns his attention back to the car. I guess it’s fair. I was the one who cut him out of my life after all, not the other way around. It was me who ignored him for so long he stopped trying.

  He rounds the car a few more times peering into the tinted windows periodically. Finally, he stops in front of me and crosses his arms over his massive chest, his eyes narrowed. “You’re sure he’s dead?” My heart sinks at his words but I nod and cast my eyes down, not able to face him.

  “Yeah,” I say in a small voice. “I don’t know what the fuck happened.” My voice breaks and my hands begin to shake giving away how scared I am.

  Fuck.

  Squeezing my hands together to try to stop the shaking is futile, but it gives me something to do. So I keep doing it until I notice him pointedly staring at them. My entire body starts trembling and tears prick my eyes. “Sorry,” I whisper and turn my gaze back to Bash. His hazel eyes keep me captive, calming some of my anxieties.

  “He showed up to a party I was at earlier. Heather dragged me to it, I never go to them. But I did tonight. Anyway, when I saw him… I don’t know. Something just flipped inside me and when he left, I followed him. I don’t know why I did it. I didn’t have a plan. I just… Followed him,” the words pour from my mouth quickly. He watches me with an impassive expression, not giving anything away.

  “He noticed me, of course, and waved at me to pull over. I did. He came to my car to confront me… He saw me. He fucking saw me, Bash. He didn’t even know me. He didn’t recognize me. He didn’t fucking remember me!” My words come out louder and more broken than I’d intended.

  Bash takes a step closer, his face a mix of rage and sympathy but he still doesn’t touch me. His presence is the only comfort he’ll give me right now. When I meet his eyes again, he nods, his face softening. I wrap my arms around myself wishing they were his instead.

  “He saw me at the party and thought I followed him because I wanted to hook up,” I laugh bitterly and shake my head, looking off to the side as I relive the night. “I played along. I don’t know why. I should’ve just driven off, should’ve just made an appointment with a therapist like a normal fucking person, but I didn’t. I followed him to his car and when we got inside… He jumped me,” I take a deep, shuddering breath and rub my thumbs up and down my arms as my eyes dart around the empty, dark road.

  “When I felt his body on mine—” My voice breaks again and I look to Bash to see if he finds me repulsive. If he sees me as a monster who’s capable of killing someone. But he just watches me with a neutral expression.

  His hands are shoved into the front pockets of his dark jeans and his shoulders are tense. It’s the only tell he’s giving that my words are affecting him at all. Tears fall from my eyes silently and I swipe at my face, wincing when my fingers brush over a wound.

  “When he jumped me I stabbed him. I just fucking stabbed him, Bash. Oh fucking god, what did I do? I stabbed him!” My broken sob echoes through the trees around us. “The first one barely nicked him and he got angry. He tried to get my knife from me but I fought back. I was able to stab him on the side only once… But then he hit me.” I motion to my face where blood is dried around my nose. His jaw tenses and I see him clench his hands into fists in his jeans. He takes a deep breath and nods as I continue.

  “I was able to bring my leg up enough to kick him in the face. I kicked him over and over and over… I just kept kicking him until he stopped moving,” my entire body is shaking violently and my breath comes in short gasps. He still doesn’t move to touch or comfort me. And he won’t. Not until I tell him it’s okay.

  “Then I grabbed my knife from his side and stabbed him over and over and…” I break off in another violent sob and cover my face with my hands. Doubling over, my body heaves with every sobbing breath.

  “I drove his car out here,” I try to say but my voice is thick and shaky. “Then I panicked and called you. You were the only person in my head. The only person I could trust. The only person… Oh fuck, Bash. I don’t know what I fucking did! What the fuck did I do?” I crouch all the way down and wrap my arms around my knees, then look up at him with tear-streaked cheeks. He crouches in front of me, bringing us mostly to eye level. His eyes are hard and his jaw tense as he looks at me.

  “Ad, you’re one strong motherfucker, you know that?” He says without a hint of sarcasm in his tone. “You not only faced your rapist alone, but you fuckin’ killed him. I’m so goddamn proud of you.”

  My body stills.

  He’s…

  He’s proud of me?

  Of all the reactions I anticipated from him, this wasn’t one of them.

  He pushes to his feet and extends his hand to me. Hesitating, my eyes flick between his hand and his face before I reach out and take it. He pulls me to my feet but doesn’t let go. When he sees I’m not about to break down at his touch, he moves his hand to cup my face. His thumb gently strokes my cheek, riding my face of tears. I close my eyes and lean into his touch, enjoying how safe I feel with him.

  “Let me take care of this shit, okay? Then I’ll take you to my place and clean you up,” he murmurs, his voice so gentle and his eyes so soft
that it makes my heart ache. I nod a few times and wipe at my face with bloody hands.

  He makes a call and promises the guys coming are quiet and that he trusts them with his life. And even though a half-decade has passed, I feel as I did in high school—if Bash Salvatore tells me it’s okay, I trust him wholly.

  A black van shows up and four huge, scary-ass bikers pile out. One looks vaguely familiar but I can’t place where I know him from. They all give me a quick once over and eye me closely before turning their attention to Bash. He barks orders at them, his hands moving in violent gestures, his voice strong and hard.

  “I don’t care what you do with him, just make sure no one fucking finds him,” he says to one of them. The man—tall with a dark beard and his hair tied into a bun at the back of his head—gives a sharp nod and climbs into the driver’s side of the G-Wagon. The familiar one gets into the passenger side and they drive away with the jock’s bloody, dead body in the backseat.

  The other two leave to find my car and drive it back to my place. I don’t ask Bash how he knows where I live. I don’t ask what they’re going to do with the body. I don’t ask any questions because I decide I really don’t care.

  Finally, he turns to me, his hard eyes softening as he drops his biker mask. Gently, he takes my hand in his and scans my face, his eyes searching mine. “Ready?” He murmurs and I nod. Keeping my hand in his, I follow him to his bike and watch as he slides effortlessly onto it. He hands me a helmet and jerks his head back telling me to sit.

  I stare at the space behind him and nibble my bottom lip. Memories of another night I called him for help flashes through my mind, only I didn’t end up on the back of his bike that night.

  And it didn’t involve a dead body.

  He sighs and his shoulders curve in slightly. “Put on the helmet and get on, Ad.” I stare at him for a heartbeat then slide on behind him as I shove the heavy helmet over my head.

  “Keep your arms wrapped around me, okay? Hold on tight,” I nod even though he can’t see it and wrap my arms tightly around his solid waist, my hands barely touching because of how broad he is.